My (erstwhile) roommate came home today, noticed my significantly-reduced pile of boxes in the entryway and murmured appreciatively. I'm now almost entirely moved in, and not a moment too soon as the opening volley in the quest to Turn Cathy into a Lawyer happens this week. Social activities kick off tomorrow, orientation begins Thursday, and classes (with homework due!) begin on Monday.
To be honest, I'm feeling like a deer in headlights. Not so much because I'm afraid of law school but because I'm feeling so wiped out from the summer. The moving, the disorientation, the finances, the logistics, everything. I feel like I've been running nonstop all summer, even going back to the beginning of the year, and yet there's still more to do.
I was hoping to have a clean beginning, to have all of the "old" things of my life behind me and be ready to put 100% towards what's ahead. But whom am I kidding? Even if that were possible, stepping 100% into the unknown is damn scary! And probably irresponsible. So I'm straddling the past and present. I still have a foot in California (maybe one of these days I'll blog the recall election, but let me point out here that the last time California elected an actor as governor, he gassed the students...), and one foot is in NJ, and in a feat of octopus-like dexterity I have my remaining limbs mostly all settled in Massachusetts.
But I'm so drained that every little divet seems like an insurmountable hurdle.
[You don't really need to read the following paragraph, I just need to vent]
Last night I unpacked my phone and plugged it into the jack in my room, and found it's on someone else's line! (And I'm not sure whose...) I'm still covered by unemployment until I start classes, and they told me (oh for heaven's sake, WHY???) I needed to call when I got to Massachusetts, but their line is always busy and it's impossible to get through. And with Visa bills with moving expenses starting to arrive, money is now a source of stress as well. And the bike I was going to bring to school for commuting was a piece of crap so I need to find another one. I can't seem to figure out how to get my renter's insurance transferred. I need to get a second hepatitis B vaccination shot for school but I don't know where. And I can't really use the kitchen because there's so much abandoned crap in the refrigerator and on the shelves so I've been having to eat out a lot more than I'd like. And every little hiccup in social relations causes me palpitations, I want to crawl under the covers and go to sleep for a week...
Anyway, this will pass. (It will, right?) And helping it pass might be that I'm probably in better shape than many of my classmates. I'm pretty much moved into my room (yay!), and tonight I'll tackle what I can. I'll save getting excited for tomorrow...